A month comes to an end. I have had lofty goals for it, but nothing seems to have fallen in place because I never listen to myself, whether it’s prayer goals or daily routines! Life is chaotic at best!
From now on I am telling you before it happens.
so that when it happens you may believe that I AM.
Jesus is! But how very hard it is to accept he is! It is easy when I stand at church on Sunday or alone in prayers in my room, but when I’m with people, I find it hard to see the “Jesus in them” that I am.
A few weeks ago, I was rushing to work and got into my car parked on the street, and a woman ran to me and banged my window—my first thought… is she my patient? She spoke to me in haste about her not having money for a meal and asked for Rs 500; however, I wasn’t convinced (India is the land of scams). I tried to tell her I have no cash on me and couldn’t help her when I noticed the rosary around her neck, and she pointed to the cross and rosary on my dashboard of my car and said, “You are a follower of Christ. Help me!”
While the rational part of my mind was like, “She is scamming you!!” My heart sank, and then I pointed to the church across the street of another Christian denomination and said, “Maybe they can help you with food and lodging.” She chose to ignore my statement and then continued to haggle with me and kept poking her hands through my half-open car window. I was already late, and I really wanted to drive and beat the rush hour traffic to land in time for rounds, and I could hear the words, “Jesus comes in various forms.” Love thy neighbor. It was during Lent, and I was very uneasy letting her be—so I pulled out an Rs 200 note and gave it to her, and she finally let me be!
I kept thinking about it and wasn’t sure why I gave in to her demands.
So I texted my mother, who reminded me of how I am always the type to get swayed by someone like this asking for food and money and reflect on my privilege and worst—I always imagine that person as Jesus. Apparently as a teen I got late to church because I decided to give water to someone on the way! So basically I realized it was more my guilt of skipping Jesus in these humans that affects me, and I tend to help, and also the empathy I have maximized at work would keep making me think, “It’s fine! I wouldve bought some food anyway with that money.”
I AM.
Jesus is there beyond realms of time, understanding and with limitless love! waiting for us to turn around and accept Him. Let us also accept His presence in our lives!!
AMEN.
