Thursday 29th February 2024

Last night as I parked my car to get to a printing shop for some urgent paperwork at night. An elderly lady knocked my door, I assumed she was a patient, but apparently she was asking , me for monetory help.

While I tried to decipher what she said after that, my brain red alert went off and saw that she asked no one else and told her I dont have cash and use my phone for payment (which was partial truth) and I walked off. My heart forced me n I turned around to hear her say something to more smile and practically disappear. …

Something similar happened outside the hospital when my dad was undergoing treatment for cancer , and when I told my generous mom, I was told how I should help. In my defence, India is notorious for thugs and thieves but this lady, last night seemed extremely honest and I was more confused as to why she asked me out of the blue. I had not seen anyone else…

TodaycasxIvread about Lazarus and the rich man’s story , I feel guilty of not helping and being judgemental.. of maybe leaving an opportunity of alms giving in Lent…now that I can’t undo it, I shall pray for that lady.

Often times in life, I pondered over moments I could have and should have helped but chose otherwise especially with money. I am a self made hard-earned money saving kinda girl and believe everyone should also do the same. So when someone troesto scheme or thug me for it, I get very upset.

This lent as I pray the surrender prayer everyday with the hallow app, I surrender this judgemental side if me, I want to be more lovingband accepting especially ofvthose seeking my help. I pray that everyone if us learns to surrender our tough parts this lent to God and pray for a softer more catholic version so we can all be at heaven ….

Prayer

Jesus I surrender my life to you (meditate on it)

About the Author

Hello! I’m Dr Analise Maria D’ Mello, (MBBS, MS obgyn, DNB) from the beautiful state of Goa in India. I was born and raised in a Roman Catholic family, learning my prayers, catechism and Catholic values from my parents and grandmothers. I am currently practicing as an obstetrician and gynecologist for 3 years since my residency. I often speak on anti-abortion to college students and married couples, and counsel distressed pregnant women with appropriate medical advice. I am part of the St Luke's Medical Guild of Catholic Doctors in my state providing services in prisons, and Lenten and advent retreats for medical professionals and their families.

Author Archive Page

14 Comments

  2. Begin a practice during Lent to keep a little cash in the car or your pocket for someone in need. You might even need it yourself if your phone fails you.

  3. Than you Analise. We all have regrettable moments. It’s how we recognize and react that gets us back on track…the track to do the will of God. You don’t have to look to far to find someone in need. Reaching out to them can be the start of something amazing…for them and for you. Peace with you my sister.

  4. Analyse,
    I would always feel that same guilt. I have started carrying around packaged food and drink that I can give to people who ask for money or the likes. Most the time people are very thankful. There are times like yesterday when the man took the food and threw it in the ditch cussing…. So he got my prayers instead.

  5. I too do not give money to strangers who ask for it. A Deacon at my church said it goes to drugs and alcohol. I am afraid of the people who beg, will they pull a knife out? I do not even make eye contact.I need to learn how to deal with this, there are more and more people looking for hand outs. What would Jesus tell me to do?

  6. “God’s plan made a hopeful beginning,
    But man spoiled his chances by sinning.
    We trust that the story
    will end in God’s glory,
    but at present the other side’s winning.”
    Limerick by American poet and polymath, Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. 1809-1894.
    Not much has changed since then but trust is a keyword. Trust in God and our fellows. One can expect to be deceived or cheated from time to time but trust that God will see your good deeds and intentions. And not one of us is self-made.
    May God lead us to trust and peace.

  7. Hi Dr. Analise. Thank you for your honesty and candor. We have ALL been there in those situations. I echo some of the comments from anonymous above to plan on keeping some spare $ in your car for a need that arises. I too don’t like being conned and deceived either but, a wise person said to me ” if you give money to away to someone who begs for it and they squander with with drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, gambling…or whatever we consider wasteful spending, it is on them and you did your part”.
    I struggle with it too. I work hard and live frugally and save my money but its by Gods grace I can do it.
    Also, another GREAT tip I learned is to keep small “blessing bags” in your car. Fill small paper bags with easily opened food. I live in USA so in my blessing bags I put in granola bars, protein bars, peanut butter crackers, soft cereal bars, waters, long shelf milk boxes, etc. Be mindful for peoples ability to chew because dental issues are rampant among life on the street.
    Give these out!

  8. A GREAT tip I learned is to keep small “blessing bags” in your car. Fill small paper bags with easily opened food. I live in USA so in my blessing bags I put in granola bars, protein bars, peanut butter crackers, soft cereal bars, waters, long shelf milk boxes, etc. Be mindful for peoples ability to chew because dental issues are rampant among life on the street.
    Give these out!

  10. Thank you, Dr. Analise. I think we’ve all faced the issue of being confronted by someone asking for a handout and wondering if they are truly in need. I’ve walked away without giving and felt awful afterwards. Now, when possible I give (I also use my phone to pay in most cases.) God has been good and blessed me so that I have the money to give, I do. If the person is truly in need I’m helping. If they are lying to get donations the sin is theirs. This way I’m not walking away from someone who truly needs help. God bless you for your time in writing these reflections. They are always a blessing to us.

  11. Thank you Analise.I can identify fully with your reaction as I found myself in a similar situation a couple of weeks ago.
    I was torn between wanting to give money to the young woman,but my inner voice was telling me that any money I gave would be spent on drugs or alcohol.
    I donate to local charities that support the vulnerable and I hope that helps somewhat.I need to open my heart more.🙏🏻

  12. Thank you Analise.Your experience resonates with me,as I found myself in a similar situation a couple of weeks ago,outside a coffee shop.
    Like you,I don’t carry cash with me and my thoughts were that even if I did give money,would the young woman spend it on alcohol or drugs? I donate to local charities that help the vulnerable but is that sufficient?I will follow the advice of other readers and carry small food items and loose change with me in future.

  13. Sometimes at the grocery store checkout, when the machine asks, “Would you like cash back?”, I will ask for $20. Then I pass it to the cashier and ask them to pass it to the next customer. I hope that sometimes it gets to a needy person.

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