Anne, my heart goes out to you, and I will keep you in my prayers. I don’t have any simple answer for the situation you’re going through, but I have some insight that might help.

First, know that some of the holiest people ahave had times of spiritual dryness. Saint Teresa of Calcutta struggled for years trying to reach that connection with God, even as she worked tirelessly for others. (There’s a good blog post about her troubles here.) Even Christ questioned that connection at his darkest hour: “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46). But even in those dark times, they continued to do the Lord’s will, as difficult as it must have been.

My other piece of insight is to try to see to what extent you can subdue your fear. There are many Bible verses encouraging us not to be afraid. If God is with us, who can be against us? Fear is a primal emotion that, working properly, spurs us to action. “Is that a tiger? My fear tells me I should either fight it or run away.” Fear for its own sake doesn’t do much good, in the same way that our brain telling us, “THIS FRYING PAN IS HOT!!!!” doesn’t do any good if it isn’t accompanied by the instinctual jerking away of the hand.

So, to the best of your ability, see how you can act upon your fear. For example, if you’re concerned about your loved ones’ safety, pray for them and act as you’re able to make their situation safer (helping them make good choices, giving them safe places to stay, etc.). Prepare — if possible — for contingencies if your worst fears are realized. Then, if you’ve done as much as you can, recognize that the fear isn’t useful, and ignore it as much as you can. (I had an old car whose “Check Engine” light was constantly on, regardless of what repairs were done, whether we took it to a mechanic, etc. Eventually I just ignored it, and it drove fine for the rest of its life, until it was destroyed by a hurricane.)

If you’ve acted on your fear as best you can, then the situation is in God’s hands. Trust in His judgment and plan for your life and the lives of those around you, and pray — as you’re able — for insight to see problems, courage to act, and strength to live through whatever happens.

Finally, I encourage you to talk to someone else. If you haven’t raised these concerns with your parish priest (or perhaps a trusted deacon or parish-affiliated spiritual advisor), see if you can schedule an appointment. Tending to the spiritual needs of their flock is one of the principle tasks for the clergy. You might also see if there is a Catholic-affiliated Stephen Ministry program in your area, who might be able to provide a free long-term caregiver who would gladly talk with you and walk with you and Christ during this difficult time. (Even if there isn’t one in your parish, there may be one at a nearby parish that can help.) If your concerns are for others, encourage them to talk to someone else. (The Stephen Ministry program is a nondenominational Christian program, so even if your loved ones aren’t Catholic — but have another Christian faith tradition — they may still be able to find someone to help.)

I hope this helps. Please know that you’re not alone, and I pray you find the comfort, peace, and connection with God you’re desperately seeking.

Great reflection today.

Twice you said that Jesus is our Savior. What did Jesus come to save the Jews from and what is He saving us from? And more specifically, what is Jesus saving you from?

I guess, if you want this Christmas to be a joyous one, you have to realize that you need to be saved. If not, the next 100 hours will be a stressful time spent trying to figure out what to buy.

Mark