Comments on: Thursday, June 20, 2019 – My father, who I hope is in heaven …

By: Jenny

Jenny — Fri, 21 Jun 2019 10:03:58 +0000

I have faithfully read posts on acatholic.org for over a year, and this post by far is the most awe, inspiring, heartfelt, pull at your heart strings post I’ve ever read. Thank you for being real, true and honest! Your words speak such truth and beauty. God’s blessings

By: barry w mertz

barry w mertz — Fri, 21 Jun 2019 00:36:58 +0000

Dan thanks so much this article hit home with me big time. My dad taught me my faith, how to fish, play baseball, become a police officer, how to be a good father, son & husband. He just could never win over that bottle and it got him in the end

By: Leah Huddleston

Leah Huddleston — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 23:05:41 +0000

What a sweet, forgiving message. I was a childhood friend of your mother and my brother, Jan, was a friend of your dad. May Jesus bless you with the knowledge of your dad’s home in heaven.

By: Chris

Chris — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 16:04:03 +0000

My dad was a non-practicing Anglican. For most of his life, he rarely went to church, his or my mother’s. Once in a while, one of my sister’s would prevail upon him to attend a Christmas or Easter service. He always obliged. It never seemed to upset my mother that he didn’t go to church. Looking back, it occurs to me that my dad lived ‘faithfully’ his marriage vows and loving his children. He was the strong, silent type. His one weakness was that he could never bring himself to discipline us. He left that to my poor mother! In hindsight, I could see how difficult that was for my mother to be the ‘bad guy’ and dad spoiling us.

I have related how my mother’s faith influenced me and my siblings. As my father aged, I noticed he began to prayer, morning and night time. While my mother sat at the edge of their bed, he would kneel, even though it was difficult to raise himself up after prayer. When I was 21 I immigrated to Canada. About 7 or 8 years later he passed away. Because I was researching our family tree, my mother sent me all documents relating to my father. To my surprise I found a document that showed my father’s Confirmation in the Catholic Church. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it.

It’s been more than 50 years since my oldest sister passed away, about 40 years for my father and 21 years since my mother passed away. My daily prayer included the souls in purgatory, but especially for my sister, father and mother. This prayer was in three parts: to God, to Jesus and to the Mother of Sorrows. When my mother’s death Anniversary approached 10 years, I felt a deep sadness wondering if my prayers had had any effect. After praying, I sat for a few moments in my sadness and I asked “Are you still in purgatory, or are you in heaven?” Needless to say I heard nothing. Very early next morning I woke up to a peppy tune playing in my head. I lay there for a while trying to remember where I had heard that piece of music. Then one line popped into my head “We are walking in the light of Christ”. That line was from an Anglican hymn sung at my church when we hosted an Ecumenical mission. I thought WOW! Thank you.

Yes, Dan, your father, my father, all fathers are in heaven. Parents are our first teachers in the faith, they lay the foundation, regardless of how they influence our faith. We have a duty to build on that faith.

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Blessings
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Thou hast given me so much. Give me one more thing – A Grateful Heart. – George Herbert

By: Helen

Helen — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 13:28:58 +0000

Thank you Dan for that searingly honest and touching reflection.For me,what shines through is that your father,despite his many human flaws,loved you deeply and surely that’s the most important thing for a child to know.My own dear father struggled with depression for most of his adult life,but he never tired of telling my mother,me and my siblings how much he loved us.He was a dear,kind man and that’s what mattered.

By: Noreen

Noreen — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 12:44:51 +0000

Dan,
That was quite touching, thank you for being so honest. I don’t drink beer or smoke cigars but now I want to do something equivalent and deeply ponder my father, mother and others. My father, who in my opinion was a good man, yet, he too had issues due to his upbringing. The one thing that was always clear was his love for our mom. She was his rudder. Your reflection is much like the stone tossed in the water, a ripple effect it has had on me – thank you and God Bless all of you.

By: Jerry

Jerry — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 11:59:20 +0000

Dan,
I’m so glad that I read your reflection today. It will give me something to share with my Brothers-in-Christ when we get together for our weekly reunion. I can really relate to your story, since I too am from Indiana and the son of an alcoholic. After reading it, I wasn’t quite sure how it tied into today’s readings until I went back and read your title for this piece: “My father, who I hope is in Heaven.” I have that same hope for my father who passed away in 2006. But, I also think the last line from St. Paul in the first reading can be something that any dad could/would say. “And why? Because I do not love you? God knows I do!” (2 Cor 11:11)

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 20 Jun 2019 10:25:52 +0000

Very moving. It is wonderful that you can set aside all the “bad” and hold onto the “good”. That’s not something many people can do with an alcoholic father, despite recognizing the mental issues (an illness or depression) behind the behaviour. Often adult children retain bitter feelings, cannot let go, and develop problems. You make it look easy; it isn’t. I am happy that you made it through.