I’m not exactly old enough to remember watching the Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour on television, but I have seen clips over the years and I know what it is. I also know that one of their most famous routines was a bit called, “Mom always liked you best!” It’s a hilarious comeback that resonates with anyone who has ever been part of a family rivalry or who has felt as if they are constantly jockeying for position in their lives. In fact, my father had a variation on the line that he used on his sister although it was a bit more self-serving than the original: “Mom always liked ME best.” (Thankfully, my aunt had a tremendous sense of humor, chuckled good-naturedly whenever he said it and privately confirmed that my dad was a bit of a beloved “mama’s boy.”)
I bring this up because I have always been fascinated by the concept of the Beloved Disciple. Not only did I wonder who he was and why he was so important but I also wondered why he felt so compelled to keep bringing it up. As someone who was brought up to believe that Jesus was capable of loving everybody equally, it annoyed me to no end that this one guy seemed to think he was better than everyone else. Seriously dude, what makes you so darned special?
Naturally theologians, scholars and even some enterprising bloggers have knocked this topic around and have come up with some interesting theories. Some say it was James (the Greater, no doubt) while others believe it was Lazarus, but I tend to fall into a traditional viewpoint that “John” must have been the favored individual. He had to be. After all, if Lazarus had that big of an ego, why didn’t they name the gospel after him?
But I digress. Even if it is John, this doesn’t really tell us anything. We don’t know if he is John the apostle or some other guy in Jesus’ life. We know he is the one taking a nap on the Lord at the Last Supper, the one who was actually present at the Crucifixion and the one Jesus entrusted to take care of his mother, so it’s logical he won a few brownie points based on these things alone, but personally, I think the reason John was the Beloved Disciple is for the plain and simple fact that he was Jesus’ brother.
Don’t get me wrong…I know it is not popular for a Catholic to believe in a literal translation of “Jesus’ brothers and sisters,” but I can’t help it. It makes way too much sense. Besides, once upon a time a priest told me that Joseph was a lot older than Mary when they wed and it was possible that he was a widower with children of his own. How do we know John wasn’t one of them?
Personally, I like to think of John as the guy who was enjoying his position as the baby of the family…until Jesus joined the fold. Perhaps he was irked when this new “whiz kid” became the center of attention and maybe there was some jealousy in the beginning. Maybe he was among those family members who went to talk some sense into Jesus during the early days of His ministry and the only one who stuck around after Christ denounced them. Maybe John felt compelled to hang back and look after his little sibling, lest He say or do something stupid and wind up getting Himself killed. Having an older brother myself…yeah, I can see it.
And I can see John not letting anyone forget that either! Anyone with an older sibling knows they have a tendency to take credit for every accomplishment in your life, exist at the top of your totem pole and will always be the peak of your pecking order. They have your back and in turn, you have theirs. After all, there are friends, there are fans and then there is family. Family may drive your crazy at times, but when they need a shoulder to sleep on, you give them yours. They are the people who stand beside you until the very end, the ones to whom you can ask a final favor from (even if they don’t owe you one) and the people you entrust with the things that matter the most when you are gone.
I may be completely wrong of course, but if John was Jesus’ older brother, then I don’t begrudge him for mentioning his special position in Jesus’ life. Why not? Our brothers are our first heroes. They teach us how to ride a bike, swing a bat and are our biggest cheerleaders when we begin to follow the path God has planned for us. They are beloved and they deserve some kudos for that. And while I believe that as God incarnate, Jesus certainly had the ability to love everyone equally…who knows? Maybe the little sibling inside of Him did like John the best!
Today’s readings for Mass: ACTS 28: 16-20, 30-31; PS 11:4, 5 and 7; JN 21: 20-25
